Thursday, September 26, 2013

Chocolate makes me beautiful

"CECILIA!  I'M WITH THE POTTY!"  I couldn't bear to use the more appropriate proposition.  Her cries for "Mommy!  Whewe ARE YOU?" continued unabated, so I persisted in identifying my position. Loudly. Till she heard me.

All the neighbors heard me too, since the windows were open....

And yes, this embarrassed me.  Because, unlike some common misconceptions about moi... (Warning: I'm about to launch into a narcissistic reflection about my character.  Please take a wine break before continuing. And please feel free to rant about yourself in the comment section; would love to hear from you.:)

Ready?  Okay... okay, you look ready...

1.  I am shy.  Yes, actually shy.  No, not on this blog, apparently.  Heh.  And no, nowhere near as shy as I was in high school, when I couldn't hold eye contact.  But do I want to be caught yelling in the bathroom?  No.  I'm easily embarrassed. Like...

2.  I find mothering in public to be an exercise in humilty/ation.  Meaning, I am more sensitive than I appear.  I have a hard time thinking clearly when my youngest kids are around; I seem to be a different person, tapped into "mommy hen" mode.  Makes me ADD... Just getting out of the van to the store: "Don't touch that!  Yucky... the weather is lovely!  Did you lock the door?  Where are my keys?  Oh... get my phone out of my pocket, will you?  Say please!  Eww not that shopping cart... you nearly knocked over that poor elderly lady!  Let's go apologize... CECILIA!"  Just like that.  And I seem all cool and calm about it, but...

3.  I'm not as laid-back as I look.  I give off the impression that I'm unfazed by the chaos of being a mom with a house full of toys and a mini van full of french fries.  When actually, it can bother me so much that I kinda get itchy... man it's tough with toddlers when cleaning their habitat is like plowing the sea.

4.  I actually want a consistently neat environment, preferably full of books.  (If you've ever had the misfortune of coming to my house, you have just fallen off your chair.  Hope you are okay!)  Legos and markers and sweet potato smeared on the kitchen chairs do, really, bother me.  Motherhood is messy.  I love my job, but I sure don't like everything about it...   I'm easily distracted.  Maybe I have...

5.  Too many alpha-waves.  Which makes me a mix of a contemplative and a space cadet.  This doesn't help with my cleaning routines.  I start to make dinner, need a pan, start to wash dishes to get to the pan (which I assume is at the bottom of my tiny kitchen sink).  Baby wants a snack meanwhile, so I put her in the highchair with cheerios, which she dumps over the floor, so I sweep them up, and then she wants "DOWN!" so I get her down, and she slips on the water that spilled from the cup she was carrying, so I comfort her, turn on a show for her, sneak back to the kitchen, clean up the spill, go back to the dishes, hear "BABY POOPED!" tend to that, it's really bad, I put her in the bathtub after and rinse out her clothes.  When that's done, I bring her back to play with her toys, and see that the pot is being used to hold My Little Ponies. (!)  In the toy box.  I get the blasted pot, and am striding back to the kitchen, when an older child peaks up from homework and says, "Mom, is dinner ready yet?"


Maybe you are laughing, but if you're a mom... yeah, daily life consists of a million riffs on "If You Give A Mouse A Cookie."  The above description is so typical, it's boring.  Like I'm yawning over here. Please get more wine.  And chocolate this time.

(The things I find on Wikimedia... hmmm.  Not sure about this concept...)
That, in sum, is why my house is not clean.  Some of you can manage it.  I honor you.  Meanwhile, I work on my distracted self.  Honestly, I can stew in deep thoughts as I put folded clothes in the fridge, and not even see the child painting the high chair with jelly.  Really! :) Anyway....

6.  When I talk with people in person, I don't always mean what I'm saying.  As in, I have a blasted dry wit and sense of sarcasm that throws people off sometimes.  Because I sound serious.  Joking around is second nature to me. So unless you have a sense of humor, we are likely not to get along all too well... though I will sure try because...

7. I'm a chameleon.  I'm pretty good at finding what's expected of me, what's needed from me, and how a person will best relate to me, and will act accordingly.  I even seem to unintentionally speak in the same accent as I'm spoken to with (so far, people find this humorous when they catch me, thankfully). This natural actress tendency does not always serve me well...

So, I'm trying to be more true to myself or--better--more the person God wants me to be.  Not the one everyone else wants me to be.  Which is hard, because I'm a people-pleaser.  But in the end, I'd rather please Him, first and foremost.  Otherwise, what's the point, really, right?  :)

Back to people-pleasing: I've been asked to answer the following questions.  You must eat one more piece of chocolate before proceeding.  You ready?  Good...

These are questions posed to those who receive the "Liebster Award" from Embrace the Struggle.  I'm told that "Liebster is a German word that can be translated as “sweetest, kindest, nicest, dearest, beloved, lovely, kind, pleasant, valued, cute, endearing, and welcome.”  Aww shucks...

But no, I have not received this award.  But since it's given to bloggers with less than 200 followers... at 8 (precious, beloved, adored, my precioussss) followers, I figure I can hope to quality:

  1. What’s your guilty pleasure?  So You Think You Can Dance.  The dancers just seem like nice people.  Don't care for the more raunchy stuff (that's what the fast forward button is for), but I do like the contemporary dances... such an art!  I don't watch much TV, so when I do... well,  I'm still catching up with episodes.   I'm down to the final 10, which was aired in July.  DON'T TELL ME WHO WINS!!  You'll ruin my TV watching for the next 2 months if you do!
  2. You’re forced to choose between buying shoes and buying makeup.  Which one wins? Dark chocolate.  Chocolate makes me beautiful.  
  3. Which skill, or set of skills, do you still want to master?  Drawing.  And learning foreign languages.
  4. Which movie recently made you weep?  A movie?  Ha!  Try the Johnson & Johnson baby lotion commercial.  (Sob)
  5. What tidbit about you would surprise most of your blog readers?  I just auditioned for the role of Mrs. Cratchit.  I had to pretend to show love and concern to a man I just met.  It was interesting.  
  6. If I took away books and music from you, which would cause you to have withdrawal symptoms?  I hope never to find out...
  7. What is a deal-breaker for you in friendships?  Dishonesty.
  8. Planes, trains, and automobiles. Which is your preferred mode of transportation?  Why?  Horses.  They have personality, and are alive. :)
  9. Who was your favorite musician when you were a teenager?  Celine Dion.
  10. Which subject did you hate the most in school? Political Science.
  11. What fashion trend did you try out and live to regret?  I do not try fashion trends.  I wait till they correspond with what I wear all the time, and then I go about with my nose in the air for a whole month or two.  
Speaking of "in the air,"  I will soon be taking a very short flight to visit beloved family.  And I am all kinds of nervous.  Thanks for your prayers for your wet blanket of a blogger here.  I will be meditating a bunch on Isaiah 41:10...
"Do not fear...  I will uphold you." 


  1. I can empathize with you on #6 (in the first set). One of the reasons why I knew that I should marry my husband is that he always laughed at my jokes. Whereas many other people just looked at me oddly when I let slip a funny line.

  2. This SO reminded me of myself. It is my firm belief that children should come with their own housekeeper. When you're discharged from the hospital, the assigned housekeeper should be waiting to ride home with you.
    My daughter manages to get into EVERYTHING. It's funny because there are many times that I'm cooking and I go to the cabinet to find a particular pot, and it's not there. My first instinct is to go and look under her bed (which is sad). I do, and that's exactly where it is.

  3. What I enjoy most about our time spent together(although it's been way too long) is your sarcasm. That and your incredible kindness and empathy.. And I get trying to overcome shyness. I, too, battle it and have gotten a lot better since high school. Oh and I totally get the fashion answer. Although I did perm my hair and peg my pants back in grade school. That was unfortunate...

  4. I almost think I relate too much. Shy, not as laid-back as I look, " I can stew in deep thoughts as I put folded clothes in the fridge, and not even see the child painting the high chair with jelly.", mix of contemplative and space-cadet. JP actually yelled at me "Wake up!" the other day. My eyes were wide open, I just was thinking deep thoughts. Also the fashion thing. Although I did attempt, I am pretty sure that I was never particularly successful.

  5. That chocolate...oh my! I can so relate to your number 4..and to your number 1.

  6. Why we get along so well I'll never know. I was born telling the world to piss off and walking into a room it's like HEY, LOOK AT ME!! And yet, I don't know, Katie, somehow, I don't see any of those things about you that you listed. You have the soul of a flaming artist.

  7. Let me rephrase that, that sounded awful. I don't mean that I didn't LIKE what you wrote about yourself. I mean that people with the traits you describe tend not to like me. After a lifetime of unsuccessful attempts at trimming an oversize personality down to socially acceptable size, I finally gave up in disgust and now I'm just myself and thank God for the blogosphere. It always rather surprises me when people I truly admire, yet whose fundamental traits are so different, you know, like me. Which you seem to. I trust I make myself obscure.

  8. I laughed all the way through this post! I hear ya on the distractions. That is so me. So glad you answered the Liebster questions. :) Good luck with the outcome of the audition. Thanks for sharing and linking up!