Mom allows kids to...

1. "Mommy, this is GREAT!  Oh, isn't this relaxing?  Isn't this THE BEST?  Here we are relaxing together in a HOT TUB!  I'm so tough cuz this is hot.  Yeah Mom, just you and me..."  (Loud, happy, dramatic sigh.)

2. I managed a smile and a quieter sigh.  Finally, finally I am on the long-awaited oxymoron known as a "family vacation," in the role of "mom."  And I had absolutely zero problem with being alone in a hot tub listening to nothing but bubbles.  I had taken a moment outside on a lawn chair to observe the sun setting over cornfields, a minute of solitude soon filled with, "Mommy!  I'm HERE!"  With all the joy in the world for it...

My nine year old felt I needed the pleasure of her company.  And who knows, maybe I did.  And maybe she needed it too.  I'd just seen her wade gleefully into a FREEZING cold lake and have the time of her life.

3. Just read this sweet article about an artist mom who is letting her little one complete her art work.  So I'll work on grace while letting my daughter complete my moments of restful hot tubbing, filling it with her girlish chatter.

4.  I love being here in Northern New England.  The lakes and the mountains are just gorgeous, and their austere majesty is just inspiring... at least if all four of your girls are not singing, "Baby you're a FIAWORK!!!" at the very top of their blessed lungs as you gaze on the wonders of creation.  Which they were.  When they weren't complaining of carsickness or boredom.

We encouraged them to look for moose.  It did not work.

5. Speaking of family time, I need to get back to the various children stomping around in wet bathing suits.  They've kept up steady requests for cottage cheese and directions on how to work the shower as I've typed here at the table.  Even the token male in our family was asking for help getting our three year old to put down the hotel broom, which she alternately was using to sword fight her sister (who brandished a tennis racquet) and then employed it to fly on, off the couch.

"I could use your help Kate, if you're available."  This just in.  Gotta go.

(Un)fortunately, I inadvertently answered today's question yesterday.  C.S. Lewis's books have affected me like no other, though Tolkien is a close second.  And my all time favorite movie is "It's a Wonderful Life."  Yeah it's sappy, but it's true: even when what you do every day doesn't feel important, or noticed, or wonderful at all, it actually is.

"I lift up my eyes to the mountains--from where does my help come?

My help is from the Lord, who made heaven and earth." Psalm 12:1-2

Linked to Camp Patton: Five Favorites and Being a Wordsmith

Packing....

I'm concluding this month's "blogathon"--in which I was only mildly "hot" once or twice, ha!--with an abbreviated post since I have exactly 1,238 things to do before I depart shortly to a remotish mountain location for an indefinite amount of time (not sure what the protocol is for sharing trip details with the blog world so I'll leave it at that.)

Suitcases yawn expectantly before me while naked toddlers dance therein as I make last minute revisions on articles, do dishes, and eat and serve food simultaneously.

So, I'm sure you can appreciate my posting haste.  :)

Unless wifi is unattainable, I will be chatting with you again on the 2nd!  Have a wonderful weekend friends, and thanks--as always--for spending time here.  Oremus pro invicem! 

Camp Braveheart

1.  On my dear dad's 70th birthday, I was at the nursing home because--like the great guy he is--he wanted to be with his mom for the occasion.  

2.  As I put my girls through the mandatory songs and dances (literally) of entertaining the residents, I happened to notice a pamphlet on the floor.  Thinking it was part of the usual detritus my kids strew in their wake, I stuffed it in my pocket and continued directing the songs from Vacation Bible School.

3.  Pulled it out that evening and read, "Camp Braveheart: a free two-day camp for any child who has experienced a loss."  Losses addressed ranged from pets to parents.  Zip-lining, kayaking, rock-climbing, with food provided.  The final day concluded with a Japanese lantern lighting in honor of the deceased loved one.

Very intrigued, I looked at the dates. The deadline to register was the next day.  And the ceremony was on my due date.

4.  I love (don't you?) when God just taps you on the shoulder and says, "You know that thing you've been asking about? Here you go."

5.  And I finally knew how to commemorate the erstwhile birthday of the baby I lost.

6.  So that's what my kids and I did today. I am pickled in salt water from swimming and decorated literally head to toe with face paint, sticker tattoos, and kid-made jewelry.  I participated in my first drumming circle (gulp), which fortunately was just a glorified singalong where I got to sing my little ones' names.

7.  For today, I am grateful, and glad, and at peace.  

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding."  Proverbs 3:5

(for Seven Quick Takes, hosted at www.conversiondiary.com)

Bound for camp

Started about three different posts, and mentally flatlined.  Low on sleep.  High on caffeine, which--when you're really tired--gives you an awful buzzy feeling while still not being able to sleep.

Not that I can sleep yet anyway: still helping two excited tweens pack.  Like actually pack, and not just add clothes and odds and ends to suitcases.  Meanwhile, hubby has been sick for days with food poisoning (please God, let it be food poisoning) and I'm feeling... less than perfect.  With two toddlers enthusiastically confused about the goings-on of the household.

Got a gig writing letters to my daughter.  The second one.  The first one didn't open the letters I gave her, one for each day, last year.  Seem's homesickness was not an issue for her.  :)  She's getting those notes back.  I will recycle them till she reads them, as she goes to this camp once a year.  :D

To ward off homesickness, I'm considering taking a shot of myself holding a sign saying, "Chore time!"  tee hee

Signing off to get ready to send these two off for a week in the woods, with love and prayers and a little bit of nail-biting.

Seeking escape

I made a big mistake.  In hindsight, that is.  I made darn sure that, unlike with my other five pregnancies, I would not be traveling or "going on vacation" while preggo.  No sir.  Done with that.  

My first pregnancy I was maneuvering overnight trains in Italy, in whatever is Italian for "just abova cattle class." My second pregnancy, I drove down to Florida with a one year old to sing at a wedding during an active hurricane season.  In all the subsequent pregnancies, I've driven down to VA at least once to stay with inlaws, one of whom was friendly enough to call me selfish for sleeping in when I was 8 months pregnant.  While visiting her.  In July. With limited a/c.  But I digress...

So been there, done that.  And this time, when I discovered the two lines, I made darn sure I wouldn't leave this house till the fall.

I still haven't moved.  In all of our last minute desperate attempts to find a way to get away, I've been foiled.  By April, the time shares we typically use were booked up for the summer.  Even when I've attempted to get the first week of September before we really give up on summer, it hasn't worked.

I've never wanted to be pregnant more.  I've never been so terrified of that idea.  I've never been so desperate to get away from it all.  From the room she would have been in.  From the bed that still has ginger chews and Zofran in the little drawer.  From the shower where I've watched my belly shrink.  (Never thought I'd be sad about something like that.)  I don't even understand why today is a "sad" day, but from the moment I woke up, it just was.  Probably because I'm leaving Phase 1 on my NFP chart.  Bleeding now would have meant she was on her way.  Bleeding now just means she is gone.

"My soul yearns, even faints, for the courts of the Lord; 

my heart and my flesh cry out for the living God." Psalm 84:2

Addendum:  So I tap out the above tearjerker, shove the laptop towards my husband with a mumbled, "I hope I'll feel better now," and wander off to redo my makeup.  He read it, picked up the phone, and called our time share company just one more time.  Last night, there was nothing available.  But today, right after I'd written this, there was a beautiful two bedroom place, close to both destinations my husband and I wanted (I wanted lakes, he wanted mountains) in Bethel.  Familiar with any Hebrew?    That's just too cool...



God... thank You.